Evil Revisited - Mastodon - Leviathan

While on brief hiatus, I thought it'd be hilarious/sad/interesting to dig up some of my old reviews and post them here to see how they held up over time and how opinions have changed or solidified since then. I've even left it with all the original typos, grammar mistakes, and/or poor sentence structure, so you know it's good. This one definitely has stood the test of time, and I definitely predicted an instant classic. Though some of my facts are off and I didn't research a few things enough, the feelings remain. Hopefully it keeps your interest and tides you over until Mosh and I stop jerking off and eating Danish long enough to write a new review.


- Hops 


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A few years back an online acquaintance of mine, Mike, introduced me to the mammoth known as Mastodon. He figured I'd like it and sent it on over. The album was their first full-length, Remission. Admittedly, I didn't really like it at first. I listened a few times, then put it away. A few months later, when I heard that the band would be playing nearby, I decided to go check them out live and see what they had to offer in that fashion. I'm really glad that I decided to go because Mastodon puts on one hell of a live show and they are a band that you need to see live in order to fully appreciate their CD efforts. Since then Remission has become one of my top 5 favorite albums and constantly spins in my CD player. Lately I've been getting anxious because the band had been touring in support of that CD for nearly two years and it was definitely time to hit the studio again and record their sophomore effort. This would definitely prove whether or not they had what it took in the long run. Glad I was to hear that they did just that and the product is this album, Leviathan, to be released on August 31st. I'm happy to say that Mastodon has exceeded my expectations with this album and put together another masterpiece that I can enjoy and spin for years to come while they again tour like madmen.

Right off the bat I'll say that if you didn't like Remission you probably won't like Leviathan. The music is equally technical and complex and if that was a turnoff for you then, it'll turn you off here. At the same time, the music maintains an unrivaled heaviness and groove that keeps you hooked. "Blood and Thunder" is a killer opening song. It opens much in the way that "Crusher Destroyer" opened up Remission - heavy, fast and in your face. Brann Dailor displays his ungodly drumming skills straight from the start and doesn't let up all the way through the album. If you aren't impressed by the drumming on the CD, seeing him pull it off flawlessly in a live setting will blow you away. The vocals on the CD are probably the biggest difference between this album and Remission. Whereas pretty much all the vocals on Remission were heavily distorted, low growls, Leviathan mixes it up a bit. The distorted growls are far less distorted and more discernible. There are also some clean vocals through the record and there is one style used on "Seabeast" and "Naked Burn" that really annoys me. It sounds really whiny and kind of stupid and it's my only beef with the album.

The album is mostly comprised of songs that are fairly short (four and a half minutes or below) but each song is carefully crafted of some major timing and style switches. The band seamlessly moves from a heavy repetitive riff to some beautiful melodic guitar work. It definitely takes a few listens to truly appreciate the eloquence of each song. I've listened to this album a good dozen times and I'm still surprised and pleased by it with every new listen. Now, in the sea of these short songs comes "Hearts Alive", which accounts for nearly one-third of the album's total length. Coming in at just over thirteen and a half minutes, it easily makes my list of top songs on the album. The seamless transitions Mastodon pulls off makes this song seem like it's only a few minutes long until you sit back and reflect on what you've just heard. I think that with the way the song ends it'd be a great way to end the album - on a heavy, headbanging note. However, the band opts to end the album similarly to the way they ended Remission - with a somber instrumental track. "Joseph Merrick" is a really good song, don't get me wrong, but as I was hearing the end of "Hearts Alive" I thought "Man, this would be a great way to end this experience." I'm not sure what the big deal about the Elephant Man is with this band (the last track on the last album was called "Elephant Man", and Joseph Merrick is the Elephant Man's real name) but hey, it makes for good music.

By far my favorite track on the record has to be "Iron Tusk". This thing has one of the most catchiest openings I've heard. Very rarely does a song make me smile when I hear it for the first time but this song does exactly that. All I could do was grin, say "That's fucking badass.", throw the horns and bang my head. You can't deny power like that. I was also pleasantly surprised by the bands eruption into a speedy, heavy riff in the middle of "Megalodon". Just listen to that song and melt in the metal goodness.

I'm giving this album a 9 /10. Very solid second effort by these Atlanta natives. I'm thoroughly impressed and I think you will be too. Make sure you catch these guys live. Watching Brann Dailor is worth the price of admission alone. The fact that each other member is equally as talented makes them just that much better. If you don't buy the CD for anything else, get it for the cover art. The cover for this album and Remission are just beautiful to look at. Solid work, fellas.

Eluveitie - Helvetios / Shock Top Raspberry Wheat

Hello again, my endearing fans! Sorry it has been a while since we last talked (I know I promised I’d call you in the morning, but I swear I lost your number), but here I am again to give you an injection of what you know you want—no, not that you little harlot—the metal! (Yes, yes, the beer too. I haven’t forgotten). So, for today, we have an exercise in polar opposites: I will be offering up my favorite pagan metal album in recent years…and an awesomely (used in a highly ironic fashion) bad beer! So…COIN TOSS…well, it looks like you get the bad end first (like you haven’t heard that one before). On to the beer!!

THE BEER

Okay, so Shocktop is a “Belgian Style Lager” and this particular “beer” is a bit confusing. As far as the texture goes, this beer is thick. When I say thick, I mean that it feels like you are drinking a mouthful of bed linens. I’m supposed to *wake up* with a mouthful of linen after a night drinking. If I experience that sensation while I’m drinking…well why would I want to experience more of it? Strike one. Now, as far as taste goes, apparently these linens were rolled in a vat of raspberry syrup. Seriously, there is no “beer” here, just raspberry. I feel like the raspberry syrup acquired a fake ID so he could get into the club. So he passes himself off as an adult, but forgets that instead of his ID saying Eye M. Beer, the ID is for a Mr. Santiago Gomez, and the two don’t have even a passing resemblance to one another. I tried taking the “well this is just maybe an after dinner dessert type beer” approach to Raspberry Wheat, but to hell with that. After two, I decided that there is just no redeeming quality to this beer, unless you just want to be a douche and think you’re cool because there’s some mohawked Pac-Man piece of orange on the bottle. And if you want to be that douche, then this “beer” is for you. Seriously…4/10, Douche.

THE MUSIC

Grade – 9/10

I like unusual music. There, I said it. In case you don’t follow patterns, I have a thing for metal using cultural influences and instruments. And if the music happens to be about mythology, pagans, warfare, or a combination of all of the above, then if I don’t like it I’m at least going to give it a chance. Eluveitie is a melo-death metal (keep up with the genres!!) band from Switzerland that use folk instruments in combination with traditional metal and sing many of their songs in the archaic Gaulish language. Previous entries into the Eluveitie catalogue have been solid “folk metal” albums, the death vocals meshing quite nicely with the dual female vocals. “Helvetios”, however, is the first metal album (“Evocation I:  The Arcane Dominion” was a full on folk album) that really has vocal duties split between the death vocals and the dual female vocals. Even the background female vocals are more prevalent and in the forefront on this album. A few of the tracks even manage to relegate the death growls to backup vocals, changing pace from the typical (I use that word loosely in conjunction with this band, as there is nothing “typical” about them) rush of Eluveitie’s albums. Now, this emphasis on the melody does not detract from the heaviness of the album. If anything, the shared focus on the melodic vocals and death vocals allow for a better contrast of the feeling of war and supplication, death and peace. There really isn’t a throwaway track on this album. On “Helvetios” more than many of the other album, even the spoken interludes (whether English or Gaul) and instrumentals create a dramatic atmosphere. Normally, I try and listen to an album and find standout tracks, but I was hard pressed to find tracks that truly stood out. But this isn’t because nothing stands out, rather everything stands out. Every time I tried to say “holy crap, this is the best song on the album,” there would be an interlude that would lead into a track even better than the last. “Helvetios” is more than a solid album from a consistent band, this album would have to be considered a high point in the band’s career and it is definitely my favorite in the band’s catalogue.

- Mosh

Godhunter - Wolves EP

THE MUSIC

GRADE: 8/10

Anecdote time! Reviews are always better when they start off with anecdotes. It's science.

A bit embarrassing, but it took me several months (maybe even an entire year) after hearing OF Godhunter to actually listen to the band. I "liked" their Facebook page early on (before they were called Godhunter… I don't remember what the previous name was, but obviously nothing nearly as badass as Godhunter, it might as well have been Fairylover), read all of their updates, followed the personal exploits of amazingly-bearded (and tender) guitar player David Rodgers…but just never gave the music a listen. Fuck if I know why. Finally, after much deliberation and procrastination, I parted ways with my hard-earned five dollar bill to nab the "Wolves" EP and hit play. I really didn't know what to expect. The only preconceived notion I had of their sound was based on the name "Godhunter", the inverted cross in their logo, and previous music I'd heard David fuck around with in the past. I guess if I had to put a finger on it, I expected some hard, death-y, weed-fueled stuff akin to… I don't know… maybe Bongzilla? That might be an insult, but fuck it. I'll make up for it with the red hot love for the EP in the rest of the review.

So, back to the action, I cautiously and gently pressed play… and the aural sensations that followed were nothing less than nipple-hardening. What these gentlemen bring to the table is a very focused effort, surprisingly catchy but no less groovy than is to be expected of bands of their ilk, with enough tinges of influences that push my hot buttons to create one all-around sexy package of man-meat. There is a ton of things to love about this band and EP, especially for a Southern boy like myself. It should come as no surprise to me, since Mr. Rodgers tends to know more about my local scene than I do, and he's from Arizona. (As an aside, no offense to anyone else in the band, I just mention David by name a lot since he's the only one of the members I've physically embraced. Maybe I can change all that next time I'm in town. *wink*)

Godhunter as a bad took me by surprise because I really wasn't expecting any or all of the elements that comprise it, let alone wrapped up a a tightly executed package. Overall, the primary vibes I get from them are stoner rockish, but I wouldn't call them a band in that genre at all. They're harsh, dirty, sludgy, 

desert-y, Southern fried, stoner, atmospheric, doomy… but never just one, and never all… you're obviously seeing my expertise in genre classification firsthand. Polka-dot accordion Candyland bacon metal? Hell yes I listen to that shit!

As mentioned in previous reviews, I prefer demos and EPs (and have grown more fond of them in the last two months, even) because the shorter total length allows for more listens during the time my grandma allows me to listen to CDs. The tracks here are longer than I expected, but still clock in at a little over 30 minutes, which is just about the perfect length. (Insert dick joke here…and its follow-up for typing "insert dick".) I listened to the EP three times back-to-back my first time in (and have put in about a dozen listens thus far), and out of the five tracks the one that sticks with me the most is "(Dead Hooker By the Side of) The Road". I get a few strange looks every time I scream "DEAD HOOKER BY THE ROADSIIIIIIIDE" in public, but I'm cool with the guys at Chuck E. Cheese, so they don't kick me out when I do. I'm not sure if it's because it's the last song on the album, so it's the most recent in memory when I reflect on the EP, if it's truly the catchiest, or if I just like words inside of parentheses… but it's a damn good track. (As an aside, I would probably rank "(Stop Being) Sheep" number two for similar reasons, so maybe it is the parenthesis thing. I also just put two sentences inside of parentheses to reinforce my love for them. Actually, make that three. Okay, I'm done.) Overall, the tracks keep my head banging throughout, singing along, and throwing the horns. I don't ask for much more than that from my metal.

The four previous paragraphs of vague praise devoid of unnecessary detail and/or spoilers too specific that you don't need to listen to the EP yourself should suffice. If you're a fan of any of aforementioned genres of music, metal, beards, beer, or parentheses, I imagine you'll find something to love about the "Wolves" EP. 30+ minutes of great music for five dollars is one of the better deals you'll find these days, and the bros in Godhunter deliver just that. After over a dozen listens in the past couple of weeks, I'm still finding little nuances of the album that I enjoy, and I dig the album more with each listen. That gets it into my regular rotation, and a well-deserved 8/10.

THE BEER

I've seen the guys in the band drink a lot of Pabst Blue Ribbon (while stalking their photos on Facebook). When I was a much younger beer drinker, I always was informed that PBR was the utter shit of shit beers. This was the beer you'd drink if you were too broke to drink your own piss. I've never actually drank the stuff myself, though, so I really did not know if there was any truth to the rumors. Not sure if the band drinks it ironically, if it's a west-coast thing, or if I'm just a fucking beer snob. I'm really uneducated when it comes to the stuff. So, for the beer review here, I'll be reviewing… 

Abita Strawberry Harvest Lager, naturally! (I really wanted to write the album review and haven't had time to get to Jim's Firearms & Beer or wherever they hell it is they sell PBR. Fuck off.)

I spent some time trying to justify reviewing a fruity, Louisiana seasonal beer along with an Arizona herb-infused organic shampoo band like Godhunter, but eventually gave up and just assumed Kevin Bacon linked them somehow. Mmm, bacon. Herb-infused bacon beer. Somebody brew that shit, stat.

Aaaaanyway, the people of Louisiana know this beer well. Each year I await its arrival with great anticipation. The Abita brewery lies but an hour from my current location, and I try to tour it at least once a year. The best time to go, however, is when the Strawberry Harvest is on tap. It's called a lager, but it's got more of a hefeweizen vibe too it. It "tastes" cloudy like a hefeweizen does. That possibly makes no goddamn sense, but neither does reviewing this beer with Godhunter, so I'm having trouble giving a single fuck at the moment. The beer is infused with Ponchatoula strawberries, a town nearby that is known for three things: strawberries, strawberry-themed shit, and a giant alligator in a cage in the middle of town (completely factual, by the way). It's one of those towns they make TV shows about to stereotype how batshit insane everyone in Louisiana is. (We do get drunk any time of day and sell alcohol in grocery stores, though. That shit's no joke. We rule.) The strawberries in question, Ponchatoula would have you believe, are not only the best strawberries in the world, but should pretty much replace whatever else one's diet consists of. Hell, we should water our plants with strawberries to make more strawberries. We should bathe with strawberry soap, and drive cars with strawberry fuel. This is serious business, folks.

To be honest, it is a pretty damn good beer, though. There's just something about it that is addictive. I can rarely keep myself from downing a six pack of these things. I enjoy many styles of beer, but this one is a beer that tastes good as a standalone beverage, and also happens to be a beer, so you'll get the added bonus of inebriation. It's a staple of our swamp-dwelling, gator-wrestling diet and if it's near you, you should add it to yours also. 9/10 for the hometown brew.

- Hops

Swedglish Update Deluxe - Torture Division, Synebrychoff

THE MUSIC

GRADE: 9/10

The three incredibly sexy members of Torture Division have been dominating the death metal scene for the past five years. If, for whatever reason, you've failed to listen to the band by now, you have few excuses - they release all of their songs for free, downloadable from their website. How often do bands do that and survive for five years? Hint: Never. So the fact that these guys have continued to release quality death metal for this long is outstanding in itself. When you hear just how good it is, you'll be hard-pressed not to buy a plane ticket to Sweden so you can personally hand-deliver the band your first-born child, your credit card, your clothes, and your motorcycle.

The band (to this point) has released their songs a few at a time, typically three sets of three per "album". "Satan, Sprit och Våld" (which I'm pretty sure translates to "Pastrami, Taxis and Coldbeer") is the second demo of the current set (the third set, if my count is right). If that makes no sense or is wrong, tough shit, I write the goddamn reviews around here. Personally I find this approach to be genius, as it gives the listener plenty of time to get intimate with the songs, cuddle with them, learn about their feelings, and just really get to know them overall. Right before you take the plunge, get down on one knee, and profess your undying love to the demo, ready to take on its last name, another demo comes along and makes you completely forget about the original. Until that awkward moment when it randomly shows up on shuffle uninvited and asks for an explanation of where the hell you've been and why you never called, of course.

Anyhoochie, this demo immediately strikes me as different than the ones before. It's not better or worse than the other fantastic songs previously released by the band, I just appreciate them in a different way. Whereas before you could certainly count on the tracks to be blistering, fantastic displays of what death metal truly should be, this demo loads down on something that really accentuates and brings out the robustness of the band - groooooove (as previously seen on albums such as "Groovy Train 2: Electric Groovaloo"). Don't worry, your favorite death metal band hasn't gone soft, they've just incorporated some new elements into the songs. Think of it like a chocolate-vanilla swirl ice cream cone, except the vanilla is death metal, the chocolate is groove, and the cone is an anus. Made of metal.

The first track, "Cirkelstryk", opens up at a slower pace than the intense explosion you may have become accustomed to with previous Torture Division tracks, then quickly shifts pace to the band you know and love. It's a great track to open off the album and keeps pace with the high standard these guys have set for themselves. You may detect hints of the groove I spoke of here and then, but nothing too prevalent. Once the track ends, though, you're in for a real treat. The next track, "Otukt", is by far the highlight of the demo, and stands out as one of my favorite TD tracks ever. Seriously, if you don't headbang from beginning to end through this track, you hate metal, Sweden, beer, sex, babies, and sexy beer-drinking Swedish metal babies. If you can only download one track from this demo (which would be retarded, since they're all free), get "Otukt". You will find a way to print out an mp3 just so you can make love to paper the song is printed on (painfully). This song is where most of the groove I speak of on this demo lies. Everything about this track is just about perfect, from J's always-stellar growls, to K's guitar playing (seriously, is this guy is the death metal riff fucking master or what), and Golden T's amazing drumming (he transitions from a groovy backbeat to a tight, punishing blastbeat more smoothly than the smoothest of man-dongs). Ending the demo is "Satan, Sprit och Våld", which continues to deliver more of the TD you know and love. It's hard to describe as vividly as "Otukt" since I pretty much used my allotment of similes, adjectives and metaphors on that song, and I'm always still riding its high going into the final track, but it's no less awesome than even the worst TD track (which is still better than 95% of death metal currently out).

If my words have not been enough to convince you to go download these three completely free tracks, then go buy some Justin Bieber and Adele CDs, now. Otherwise, head over to their website and check them out. Then, after thanking me for informing you about the best band you've ever heard, donate some money to them so that they can continue to put out more music like this. The end.

THE BEER

Going with the Swedish theme, I tried to get a beer from Sweden to sample for this review. Unfortunately, Swedish beers are hard to come by around here. So, we're going to make this a Scandinavian theme, because fuck you. The lone beer I was able to find among Norway, Sweden and Finland was a Finnish beer called Synebrychoff Porter. I asked someone I know in Finland about this beer and he had never heard of it, so obviously I'm off to a fantastic start.

The beer itself ended up being pretty good. It's a little stronger than your standard porter (the standard porter around here, anyway), and I could see a few of these putting me on my ass (especially with my tolerance being miniscule after my recent run-in with bodily organ removal). It's got a strong start and an even stronger finish, with coffee/dark roasted undertones at the end. It's probably not a beer you'd start the day off with, but more of a mid-to-end range beer, something to build up to and cap off the night with. I'd rate the beer higher than the Sierra porter I had a few reviews ago, but I don't have any food to pair it with to make the orgasmic explosion in my mouth like that one did, so I'll give it a 7/10.

Overall, another positive experience with all things Scandinavian. Someone work on moving everyone and everything from there to here so get some more street cred. Thanks.

- Hops

Not Quite Dead

Just in case you were wondering, we're not quite dead yet. A small update to thank our friend Derek over at Rickety Old Shack for throwing together a oh-so-sweet logo for us. Look for our review of Torture Division's new 3-song demo very soon!

- Hops

Big Ol' Jewish Update

Since Hops started things off with a bang, I—your humble Mosh—figure I couldn’t let the bang die just yet. You’ve already been given a treat with a multi-review, so how ‘bout another?  Only, I don’t want to overload your brew sensibilities, so how about a nice local (to Israel) brew, and then a double dose o’ metal? Sounds good? Yea—no? GTFO, you know you want it.

THE BEER - GOLDSTAR

So, this review is going to be broken into two parts: the draft and the bottle.  By the end, it’s clear why (and why would you argue with me anyway?)

Draft - 8.5

Goldstar is the local beer here in Israel. Every bar seems to have it, and everyone seems to drink it. Labeled as “Our Original Taste…”, Goldstar makes me think that Israel might have something going on. Goldstar is a dark lager. There is a slightly dry sharpness to it, and the bitterness present in a lot of lagers is not found in Goldstar. It’s not a very full-bodied beer, neither does it taste like it is watered down in any way. This mildness, tempered with its sharp, dry nature allows for an easier consumption of multiple pints (myself, my boss, and one of my co-workers knocked out four or five pints in one sitting once we arrived in Israel). Also of note:  this is a good barbeque beer. Believe it or not, there are quite a few American styled grills in Israel, and the perfect companion to some killer wings or a behemoth burger is definitely Goldstar.

But, wait!  There’s more!

Bottle - 6

What the hell?? Who gave me Budweiser (if that offends you, then you need to pay really close attention to everything we say…ever)? Goldstar—when poured from a bottle—while retaining its body and smooth (maybe) consistency, gains a bitterness. This bitterness, coupled with the sharpness, make it very uneasy drinking for a picky beer drinker. And that, honestly, ruins it. The bottle gives it a cheap domestic Americana taste, and it doesn’t pair well with anything. Give me back my draft!!

**I spoke to the clerk at the music store (see below review) and he says that the above is pretty much how Israel feels about Goldstar. It is a great beer; better draft than from the bottle. And, I quote, “In Israel, we sit around and complain about how bad everything is, but Goldstar is great:  no complaining!”

Okay, so in keeping with the Israeli theme, here’s a good band to check out while you’re consuming that Goldstar:  Orphaned Land. For those of you that don’t know who Orphaned Land are, they are a progressive metal band out of Israel (uh, duh…sorry). Orphaned Land are progressive metal with death elements (vocals and some—but not much—music) and a lot of Middle Eastern musical elements interwoven. Their albums are usually concept albums, revolving around usually Jewish and Muslim themes. Today, we’re going to take a look at two of their albums—their most recent, "The Neverending Way of ORwarriOR" and "Mabool:  The Story of the Three Sons of Seven".  Holy hell, that was a mouthful!

THE MUSIC

"Mabool:  The Story of the Three Sons of Seven" - 8.5

Ok, so these guys seem a bit pretentious at first, but once you get past the long-winded title, there’s some real meat to this. “Mabool” is a very tight progressive album. Its longest song clocks in at around 9:20, so there’s no listing to be found within the confines of this album. Even though there never seems to be a lot going on, what we have throughout this album are some very tight riffs as well as hook-laden songs. These songs are very structurally diverse:  the story of the flood is woven together with two sets of distinct vocals (powerful and predominant clean vocals offset by pissed-off-God-like vocal growling) and an interesting use of keyboards (at times very much background melodies, other times the driving force of the songs). At times, “Mabool” comes off feeling like an early Dream Theater album, at other times it drifts into the “What if Max Cavelera and Mikael Åkerfeldt had an Israeli love child?” territory. Like any good cultural album, this one makes good use of Middle Eastern rhythms, and a female singing in the native tongue. All of this lends to the depth of the Mabool album.  My only complaint is that the death vocals could be a little more frequent (God is pissed at this point in time, after all).

*Standout Tracks:  A Call to Awake, The Kiss of Babylon

"The Neverending Way of ORwarriOR" - 8

So, for the second round, we have …ORwarriOR. Yes, just because they didn’t want to be any less pretentious with their title this time around.  Once again, we have a tight progressive metal concept album, this time telling the story of God’s chosen warrior. We still have a good use of riffs and hooks, but this time around there is more of a precise feel of the rhythm in the times changes, and song shifts. It is slightly reminiscent of Opeth. The middle eastern elements shine through more in the melodies and instrumentals on this album. Even though it starts to lose focus a little past the middle mark, Orphaned Land manage to bring themselves back for an explosive finish.  Oh, did I say that Mabool didn’t use the growls enough? Well, …ORwarrOR fixes that. The vocal balance is actually nicely perched in the middle of the scale. There is a definite balance vocally on the album. For a nice bonus, the tour edition that I picked up out here comes with a bonus disc with one new song, two demos, and two instrumental workings.

*Standout Tracks:  Operation: Uprising, From Broken Vessels

****A big thank you goes to Arye, at The Eighth Note (Hatav Hasmini).  He found the Orphaned Land cd’s for me and gave me his insight on Goldstar.  So, I’d like to leave you with another of Arye’s quotes:  “It’s easy to be despot in small country.”  So true, Arye, so true.  Remember folks, keep your despotism small, and you’ll easily conquer your own little world.

- Mosh

Delay

Sorry for the delay in the latest posts. I was nearly called to Valhalla to join my metal brethren earlier this week. I have survived and am well on my way to recovery. Look forward to our next update this weekend!

- Hops